2 Ups & 3 Downs From WWE 205 Live (Jan 10)

Downs...

3. Seduction For Dummies

Dar Cedric II
WWE.com

If only I’d watched this episode of 205 Live when I was unskilfully navigating romantic waters as a teenager with little in the way of game. WWE, the biggest wrestling company on the planet, have failed for a decade to produce a superstar matching John Cena’s peerless wattage - yet have somehow contrived to write a how-to guide on getting in the pants of an uninterested girl.

The formula is simple: all you need to do is set a target, reciprocated attraction no barrier. Pester her with almost tangible sleaze. Pronounce her name as if you’re auditioning for a skin flick. Undermine her boyfriend. Act incredibly insincere and sleazy, on camera, even if your behaviour is being recorded and can be watched back for the princely sum of £/$9.99.

You might get slapped a few times in the process, but fret not: there’s no such thing as a suspenseful game of will-you-won’t-you seduction. Romance is a war of attrition. Women being women - daft, hormonal creatures defined entirely as objects - will eventually just confuse themselves and fall at your feet.

At the finish of Noam Dar’s match with Cedric Alexander, Fox rescued the Scottish Supernova from the jaws of defeat, sacrificing her boyfriend in a state of hysterical confusion. The poor girl couldn’t help herself.

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Contributor
Contributor

Michael Sidgwick is an editor, writer and podcaster for WhatCulture Wrestling. With over seven years of experience in wrestling analysis, Michael was published in the influential institution that was Power Slam magazine, and specialises in providing insights into All Elite Wrestling - so much so that he wrote a book about the subject. You can order Becoming All Elite: The Rise Of AEW on Amazon. Possessing a deep knowledge also of WWE, WCW, ECW and New Japan Pro Wrestling, Michael’s work has been publicly praised by former AEW World Champions Kenny Omega and MJF, and surefire Undisputed WWE Universal Champion Cody Rhodes. When he isn’t putting your finger on why things are the way they are in the endlessly fascinating world of professional wrestling, Michael wraps his own around a hand grinder to explore the world of specialty coffee. Follow Michael on X (formerly known as Twitter) @MSidgwick for more!