5 Match Star Ratings For WWE Royal Rumble 2023
2. Women's Royal Rumble Match
The women's Royal Rumble match followed almost the exact same pattern as the men's, which was hardly ideal.
The number one entrant lasted the duration - as did #2, even though she wanted to be #1, even though there's no discernible difference. Just have her come out at one! Even if it's woefully contrived!
It was another weird Triple H deal. Ostensibly, Morgan is a babyface for relishing the challenge, but actually manifesting it is stupid. Also, she somehow contrived to be smarmy about being hard-working. So she's an arrogant, stupid babyface who wants to do things the right way.
What are we doing here?
What Triple H was actually doing here was more of the same: wrestlers enters, works a sequence of uneven quality, joins the mass of bodies lurking by the ropes and turnbuckles. The abject state of the wider division became apparent as the match dragged on. So few performers generated a pop, and too many worked overtly choreographed sequences that looked like somebody trying to wrestle.
It wasn't all an indictment of Triple H's lazy, shortsighted booking. The rebooted Asuka was hugely over, and while she struggled against certain wrestlers, the new/old look is at least a promise of a push. Roxanne Perez impressed to a considerable extent. Fans jeered her exit. Pat McAfee - who basically said "I don't watch this sh*t on my own time, what's going on here?" for four and a half hours - was actually, earnestly upset by what was far too short a stint. He wasn't being enthusiastically loud because that's his onscreen gimmick on this occasion.
The countdown and pop bit - the thing that makes the Rumble the Rumble - developed into something depressing. So many of these women aren't over, and that's because Triple H debuts them to little fanfare with no long-term plan. Vince McMahon was pilloried for doing that. Triple H, in one division anyway, is doing the exact same thing.
Few intriguing stories were advanced meaningfully. Nothing feels interesting on the road to WrestleMania. Bayley Vs. Becky Lynch already feels as overdone as Dolph Ziggler Vs. Kofi Kingston.
The finish was outstanding, mind. The last two pulsating moments were worked almost entirely on the apron. Rhea Ripley - whose selling was almost comical at certain points - did eventually elevate the whole thing with her masterful, risky body control. It was rapid palpitations stuff by the finish. Almost special-tier.
For almost a full hour before that, it was sloppy and tepid.
Star Rating: ★★★