5 Match Star Ratings For WWE Royal Rumble 2023

3. Bianca Belair Vs. Alexa Bliss - SmackDown Women's Title Match

Bray Wyatt Pitch Black
WWE.com

It's not often that work dread (or as the yanks call it, the "Sunday Scaries") factors into this job, but Christ almighty, how do you get 200 words out of Bianca Belair Vs. Alexa Bliss, a match contested for the WWE SmackDown Women's title at the Royal Rumble Premium Live Event (sponsored by Mountain Dew Pitch Black - Do The Dew!), which, as you know, is the first step on the Road to WrestleMania?

That's a start.

Wrestled at middling quality to a near-silent backdrop - which the immense scale of the backdrop brought into focus - it felt nothing like a title match. The action was fine at best, until the hesitant choreography crept in as often happens between these two performers, but it is easier to state what this match wasn't than what it was (a nothing match).

It wasn't intense. It wasn't state-of-the-art, nor was it a timeless throwback to a classic style. It wasn't dramatic. It wasn't heated. It wasn't creative. It wasn't believable, nor was it so thrilling that you forgave its exaggerated action. It wasn't so-bad-it's-good. It wasn't good. In-house WWE wrestling occurred in the regulation order in accordance with what WWE "logically" prescribes. It ended on an anticlimactic note, after which Uncle Howdy appeared onscreen and said his usual b*llocks.

He had no-sold a dive from several feet in the year, surrounded by fire, in the previous match.

But PWG bad!

Star Rating: ★½

Contributor
Contributor

Michael Sidgwick is an editor, writer and podcaster for WhatCulture Wrestling. With over seven years of experience in wrestling analysis, Michael was published in the influential institution that was Power Slam magazine, and specialises in providing insights into All Elite Wrestling - so much so that he wrote a book about the subject. You can order Becoming All Elite: The Rise Of AEW on Amazon. Possessing a deep knowledge also of WWE, WCW, ECW and New Japan Pro Wrestling, Michael’s work has been publicly praised by former AEW World Champions Kenny Omega and MJF, and surefire Undisputed WWE Universal Champion Cody Rhodes. When he isn’t putting your finger on why things are the way they are in the endlessly fascinating world of professional wrestling, Michael wraps his own around a hand grinder to explore the world of specialty coffee. Follow Michael on X (formerly known as Twitter) @MSidgwick for more!