5 Most Insane Things Happening In Wrestling Right Now (August 10)
1. How To Behave At A Pro Wrestling Show
A Redditor recently posted New Japan Pro Wrestling's endearing English language guide to behaving oneself at a show: the subtext is "Don't stand up please, you'll block somebody's view," but it's all delivered with such charm - "Don't be shy, "boo" to heel wrestlers!" - that you would happily play along.
Now imagine WWE's.
1) Count along with the referee, but not with Tye Dillinger. It's his gimmick, yes, but we don't like it because you do.
2) Stomp along with the 2.9 count! Even though no finishers are protected!
3) Stop chanting "CM Punk". He's not coming back, and if he did, we'd doubtlessly conspire to p*ss him off again.
4) Stop chanting "Two sweet". It's OUR INTELLECTUAL PROPERTY, D*MNIT!
5) Stop chanting "What?", you obnoxious c*nts.
6) Keep chanting for your favourite wrestlers! It doesn't matter. We're not going to push them. But you might enjoy that for a moment.
7) Stop chanting "We are awesome". You're not awesome. You're enabling everything you hate by turning up.
8) Stop chanting. Except if you're chanting for Roman Reigns. Then you may chant.