6 Ups & 5 Downs For WWE Raw (7 July - Results & Review)

4. "The Athletic Ability Of A Dead Fish"

Bron Breakker has never been regarded as a strong promo, and his turn on the mic Monday night will not change that prevailing narrative. But Breakker did generate some buzz with a low-key unhinged rant that seemed to catch Seth Rollins and Paul Heyman off-guard. Typically, Rollins and Heyman would do the talking for the stable, but it was Bron who grabbed the mic and started talking, leaving Seth and Paul to look at each other behind Breakker, confused.

During his rant, Bron spoke about how he was standing there because Rollins and Heyman have a vision of him as the face of WWE for the next two decades, setting the stage for the eventual clash between him and his teammates. Breakker said he didn’t like Sami Zayn at all: his ugly face, his stupid beard, his music that everyone sings… all of it just drives him crazy.

Most of all, Breakker couldn’t wrap his head around why fans cheer for a guy with “the athletic ability of a dead fish,” a guy who didn’t play sports, and doesn’t workout in the gym. Sami, Bron said, had an expiration date that he was going to stamp later that night.

This was jock meathead Bron taking swipes at a guy he doesn’t understand, and it was a very in-character promo. He didn’t look comfortable on the mic, but that actually worked as he paced and grew angrier while talking about Zayn. Blasting Sami for not being as outwardly athletic was such a perfect line, stopping just short of, “Bro, he can’t even bench 250.”

Good stuff from Breakker, though having it lumped in with Bronson Reed’s strange ramblings and a Heyman stint on the mic diluted it a bit.