7 Worst Wrestling Mini-Movies
5. Spin The Wheel, Make The Deal
Okay, now things are going to get interesting.
When Jake Roberts left the World Wrestling Federation in 1992 following his loss to The Undertaker at WrestleMania VIII, many predicted big things for “The Snakeman” when he made his eagerly anticipated jump to WCW.
Immediately embroiled in a headline feud with Sting, those predictions would seemingly be realised with Roberts booked against WCW’s poster boy in the main event at Halloween Havoc...but not without first being given the unenviable task of filming one of the most god-awful mini movies in wrestling history.
Seemingly based out of a weird pirate-themed biker bar, the movie is a cross between Mad Max and an episode of Wheel of Fortune; which leads you to assume Dusty Rhodes was channel hopping between the two when he came up with the idea.
The movie itself depicts Sting’s meeting with his rival, Roberts, at the bar as they prepare to “spin the wheel” and “make the deal”; i.e. determine the stipulation for their Halloween Havoc showdown. It’s a great concept – and one that was reused by WWE some years later uder the guise of “Raw Roullette” – yet, as per WCW, they somehow managed to gold into lead.
Besides Roberts (who is typically convincing in his role as the sinister, brooding villain), the amount of over-the-top theatrics in this 7 minutes is enough to leave you begging for a William Shatner showreel. Despite the amateur dramatics, the leather-clad punters in attendance seem transfixed, alternating focus from side to side as though their watching the Wimbledon Final.
Did I mention that Madusa plays hostess for the gig too? Why not, eh? There’s also an eye-patch wearing little person thrown in there as well for reasons that defy logic but that’s the least of our worries at this point. Think Hornswoggle’s evil pirate brother and you have an exact visual.
Following some brief back-and-forth banter between the two main event superstars, eventually – and mercifully – the mini-movie concludes; but not before both men face-off, complete with lightning bolt eye-lazers for added impact. Yeah.
Best/worst of all, despite going out of their way to record, edit and soundtrack the mini-movie, WCW – in their infinite wisdom – would reportedly neglect to pre-tape or rig the wheel for the deciding spin; inevitably leaving the actual match stipulation to pure chance.
With the options including such salivatory score-settlers as the “I Quit” Match, Barbed Wire Match and Texas Death Match, the deciding spin wound up landing on the worst possible outcome on the whole board – a “Coal Miner’s Glove” match. Because nothing says “suspense” quite like a dusty glove on a pole.
As bad as the whole thing was, WCW totally outdid themselves with this next entry and made the whole “Spin the Wheel” debacle seem like The Godfather.