9 Lessons Vince McMahon Should Have Learned From Ted Turner

1. Remember He's Not Ted Turner

Back when the Monday Night Wars were a thing, McMahon was a hands-on boss and head booker of a pro wrestling promotion, as well as a featured on-screen performer in his own TV shows. Nevertheless, he pretended as if the Wars were between him and Ted Turner, the multi-billionaire ruler of a huge multimedia conglomerate. That wasn€™t the case. Eric Bischoff was Vince€™s opposite number. Ted Turner was as far above Vince McMahon as Vince McMahon is above Jim Cornette -actually, probably further. Vince McMahon is not Ted Turner - for one thing, Ted Turner is a genuine billionaire. When he lost seven billion of his own money as his stock crashed after the failed AOL merger, he still had twice as much money as McMahon has ever had, even at Vince's most affluent. He was actually cracking jokes in the media at the time about being able to live on two billion if he economised a little. Ted Turner can afford to pledge hundreds of millions of dollars to humanitarian causes. He was the USA's largest private landowner until 2011. Vince McMahon is a very rich man, and a paper billionaire if nothing else goes wrong - because every time something does, he dips back down to being a multi-multi-millionaire instead. And there€™s nothing wrong with that! It€™s a ridiculous amount of money to have and be worth, and a ridiculous level of success to have maintained. Let Ted Turner be Ted Turner. At the end of the day, it€™s good enough - it€™s more than good enough - to be Vince McMahon, the greatest pro-wrestling promoter in history. Oh, and he won the Monday Night Wars. But you already knew that, didn't you?
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Professional writer, punk werewolf and nesting place for starfish. Obsessed with squid, spirals and story. I publish short weird fiction online at desincarne.com, and tweet nonsense under the name Jack The Bodiless. You can follow me all you like, just don't touch my stuff.