Lana Gets Restraining Order & Files For Divorce On WWE Raw

The former 'Ravishing Russian' says "goodbye" to Rusev in Raw bombshell.

Bobby Lashley Lana
WWE.com

The so-bad-it's-somehow-the-greatest-storyline-of-all-time Rusev/Lana/Bobby Lashley saga rumbled on during last night's WWE Raw, with the former 'Ravishing Russian' announcing that not only was she divorcing her soon-to-be-ex-husband, but that she was filing a restraining order against him as well.

Lana initially claimed that the order would prevent Rusev from coming within 90 miles of her, which seemed a tad unfeasible given that they share a workplace. She then "corrected" herself by switching to "90 days," then "90 feet," finally nailing it. Good.

The divorce papers also featured the real names of both performers (Catherine Joy Perry and Miroslav Barnyashev), because screw kayfabe, right?

This big, dumb, beautiful mess of a segment led into a simple squash victory for Lana's new squeeze, Lashley, who demolished poor old No Way Jose with little resistance.

It'd be interesting to find on the grounds on which Lana filed this restraining order, given that her and Lashley have been the aggressors for the duration of this feud. Rusev must be feeling it. The unfortunate sod just showed up for work one week to find out his wife had been sleeping around behind his back, only to settle into a grim routine of getting the p*ss beaten out of him every week.

This storyline is the worst. This storyline is the best.

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A caffeine-dependent life-form from the frozen wastes of north east Scotland. He once tried to start a revolution but didn't print enough pamphlets, so hardly anyone turned up. Give him a follow @andyhmurray. You'll have a great time. Maybe.