In the world of professional wrestling, celebrities are kings. Whenever one shows up on Raw or SmackDown, the wrestlers just fawn over them, and the announcers gloat over their appearance. The fans for the most part are sick of seeing them. After all, they're watching a show filled with talent who are celebrities in their own right. Why should they care about a B-movie star or someone from a cr*ppy reality TV show? People watch wrestling to watch wrestling. That simple fact never seems to have fully registered in Vince McMahon's mind. Because of that, we get weird dancing segments, singing competitions and plenty of celebrities. Unfortunately, besides the rare appearance of someone like Mike Tyson (who helped elevate Steve Austin), celebrities in professional wrestling are usually a bad mix. While there have been a lot of lame ones, some have been downright terrible. For this article, we'll only look at "celebrities" that actually exist (you're safe for now, A-Team and The Muppets!). We'll also just look at moments that are only from WWE history (Jay Leno, you can relax). Here are the 10 most ridiculous celebrity cameos in WWE history.
10. Chuck Norris
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cYom2NqCXhs Well before Chuck Norris became ironically cool, he was lame. Super lame. Nobody that you looked up to watched Walker Texas Ranger and legitimately thought it was a good show. It just didn't happen. But the WWF wanted Norris to bring some of his law and order over from CBS Saturday Nights to Survivor Series 94. He was the guest enforcer (or the "trouble shooting referee" as Howard Finkel introduced him) for Yokozuna vs. Undertaker. As Norris walked his way to the ring, he was promoted as one of the "premiere" movie stars on the planet. Now, unless you think Sidekicks and Delta Force 2: The Colombian Connection were huge hits, then that's a bald faced lie. Shame on you Finkel! Now, yes, Norris is a karate master, but is there any conceivable way he could have picked up Yokozuna or Taker and put them back in the ring if things got out of hand? Well, his skills were put to the test when late in the match, Bam Bam Bigelow and King Kong Bundy attempted to interfere. Norris just stood there...and stood there...and had a silent showdown with the two. However, right behind him I.R.S. slid into the ring and started beating up Undertaker. Norris was oblivious, just like a regular referee. You had one job Chuck! One job! Well, late in the match he did kick Jeff Jarrett in the chest. But was that really worth his appearance fee? Basically, he was about as useless as a 12 year old boy. Speaking of which...
As Rust Cohle from True Detective said "Life's barely long enough to get good at one thing. So be careful what you're good at."
Sadly, I can't solve a murder like Rust...or change a tire, or even tie a tie. But I do know all the lyrics to Hulk Hogan's "Real American" theme song and can easily name every Natural Born Thriller from the dying days of WCW. I was once ranked 21st in the United States in Tetris...on the Playstation 3 version...for about a week.
Follow along @AndrewSoucek and check out my podcast at wrestlingwithfriends.com
