4. Akebono
In the world of sumo wrestling, Akebono Taro is a legend. In the world of professional wrestling...well, most people probably aren't that familiar with him. At least they weren't, until he took on The Big Show in a sumo wrestling match at WrestleMania 21. First off, why did the two have a sumo wrestling match? Shouldn't Big Show have tried to straight up wrestle him, because he's in a professional wrestling ompany? That took away all of the moves he learned over the course of his career. You can't chokeslam someone in sumo wrestling! Second of all, and most importantly, it would have saved us from having to see Show in what appeared to be a giant thong. Unlike Bart Gunn taking on Butterbean at WrestleMania 15 in a real fight, this one was staged. What makes this confusing is that Show lost in about a minute as he was easily manhandled by the pro. Why would WWE make one of their biggest stars look so foolish? Afterwards, the two held up each other's arms and smiled for the crowd. After that, they went to McDonald's to see who could eat more Big Macs. Okay, actually they didn't, but it would have been more entertaining than the actual match.
Andrew Soucek
As Rust Cohle from True Detective said "Life's barely long enough to get good at one thing. So be careful what you're good at."
Sadly, I can't solve a murder like Rust...or change a tire, or even tie a tie. But I do know all the lyrics to Hulk Hogan's "Real American" theme song and can easily name every Natural Born Thriller from the dying days of WCW. I was once ranked 21st in the United States in Tetris...on the Playstation 3 version...for about a week.
Follow along @AndrewSoucek and check out my podcast at wrestlingwithfriends.com
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