WWE: 11 Stars Who Should Never Have Changed Entrance Themes
11. Mark Henry
When you're legitimately one of the strongest men on the planet, you should have theme music that reflects that fact. The last song that The Nation had was pretty badass (the one after the silly repeating "We are The Nation! Of Domination!"), but when Henry broke out on his own, things got pretty bad. He became Sexual Chocolate, made love to his sister, and an elderly woman and had a downright awful entrance theme. Instead of a cool guitar riff accompanying him to the ring, we had Henry's own voice smoothly (and creepily) saying "It's sexual baby. And I want to give it all to you." What does that have to do with getting yourself hyped up for hand to hand combat? The song was just sexual, and in case you didn't know it was sexual, the song has the word "sexual" in it 14 times, leaving the impression that Henry had entirely different intentions for what he was about to do to his opponent. Luckily, Henry did eventually get a badass song in "Somebody Gonna Get It", but despite that, it may be years before you're able to scrub "Sexual Chocolate" out of your memory.
As Rust Cohle from True Detective said "Life's barely long enough to get good at one thing. So be careful what you're good at."
Sadly, I can't solve a murder like Rust...or change a tire, or even tie a tie. But I do know all the lyrics to Hulk Hogan's "Real American" theme song and can easily name every Natural Born Thriller from the dying days of WCW. I was once ranked 21st in the United States in Tetris...on the Playstation 3 version...for about a week.
Follow along @AndrewSoucek and check out my podcast at wrestlingwithfriends.com
