WWE And Impact Wrestling: 7 Worst Moments Of The Week (Mar 5)

1. A Corpse Burning Jamboree

Randy Orton Flames
WWE.com

Did I miss something over the past couple years? Did we know Sister Abigail was dead? Bray has done some spooky stuff he attributed to her in the past, but I always thought some woman wrestler would eventually be called up to play the role. This could be all on me for not understanding what they were going for. Sometimes I can't decipher the finer points of WWE's storylines.

I guess the point here is the company never went out of its way to: 1) play up the fact she’s very much dead. 2) Let us know she was buried on Bray’s property. 3) Bring her up more than once every couple months, so if something happened to her it would actually mean something. 4) Establish what exactly it was that made Bray give Orton the "keys to the kingdom." Did they mean keys to the shed?

I was there live for the show, and must say I was horrified. Where the f**k did Minnesota nice go? Cheering a man while burning a woman’s corpse? You make me SICK audience. Also, since she was Bray’s sister, and since he first mentioned her a few years ago, you can only assume she died pretty young. That makes it even more disturbing. The blood thirsty audience, though, ended the night with a “Randy! Randy! Randy!” I fled the building fearing for my own life, mainly because 205 Live was about to start.

From a character standpoint, has Randy ever done anything more deplorable? Grave robbing is a felony...I imagine grave arson is probably frowned upon as well in the eyes of the law.

The Viper's pre-meditated shed burning was the worst segment I’ve seen all year. I haven't seen anything that stupid since his face started shape-shifting in the mirror at No Mercy, or the time he briefly had spooky, dumb glowing eyes. I guess I’m curious to see how crowds will respond to his actions, but I don’t see how he can emerge from this as a babyface...which is what I think they’re going for? Maybe?

With this angle it's hard to tell. RIP Sister Abigail, you were one of WWE's best characters...pretty much by default since you were never on TV.

Time to kick out.

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As Rust Cohle from True Detective said "Life's barely long enough to get good at one thing. So be careful what you're good at." Sadly, I can't solve a murder like Rust...or change a tire, or even tie a tie. But I do know all the lyrics to Hulk Hogan's "Real American" theme song and can easily name every Natural Born Thriller from the dying days of WCW. I was once ranked 21st in the United States in Tetris...on the Playstation 3 version...for about a week. Follow along @AndrewSoucek and check out my podcast at wrestlingwithfriends.com