WWE Hell In A Cell 2017 Review

Hell in a Cell Jinder Mahal
WWE

Another Airfix woman fresh off the assembly line appeared on screen to speak to Kevin Owens about his upcoming Cell match, who recanted the line that "no-one emerges from the match the same." Except just about every bugger has been in Hell in a Cell by this point, and they're all generally fine a few days later. Come on: hyperbole has no place in wrestling.

Bobby Roode and Dolph Ziggler had a yawn of a match, before it was time to clench our collective arsecheeks in anticipation of Shane's unavoidable, idiotic plunge from the cell. It had all the drama of a suicide bid; nobody asks for it, but once it's happening, it's impossible to look away.

Kevin Owens is clearly weak these days. On his debut, he KO'd Sami Zayn with a couple of powerbombs. Now, he can't put away a 40-something non-wrestler without chicanery. Maybe it's the schedule. Midway through - after a thankfully successful shooting-star press which incurred terrible Brock Lesnar flashbacks - Shane decided "nobs to this," and tried exiting the cage, only to be temporarily foiled by his fumbles with the wire cutters. From that point on, we knew where this was going. Hello, butterflies.

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Editorial Team
Editorial Team

Benjamin was born in 1987, and is still not dead. He variously enjoys classical music, old-school adventure games (they're not dead), and walks on the beach (albeit short - asthma, you know). He's currently trying to compile a comprehensive history of video game music, yet denies accusations that he purposefully targets niche audiences. He's often wrong about these things.