Oh boy. Here we go again. The best this, the worst that; you said it yourself on Twitter the other day Liam, it's all opinions! You know at some point we're gonna see one that's too high and another too low and Christ man, you know Wrestlemania X-Seven is going to be the last page because the Bible said it would be, in the lost book of Jasmine comprised from those few of the Dead Sea Scrolls they were just never able to find! So how could this ever become objective for us man? Just give us a reason to read! Well, for one, 'Mania 17 ain't last. I've spent a few days comprising this list- in-between joints- on the basis of a system. A system to attempt to rank every Wrestlemania event to date into a relative objectivity by devising the 6 factors that make a Wrestlemania a success or a failure and checking to see to what degree each event had them or, indeed, did not. Here are those 6 factors that contribute, objectively, to the quality of a Wrestlemania: 1. OVERALL MATCH QUALITY (OMQ): Pretty simple man, consider every single match on the card and select a rating based on their average quality. This eliminates the event being skewed by one or two brilliant matches. Hint: 13 is going to suffer. 2. CROWD HEAT: Vitally important, the reactions, or lack thereof them of the live crowd, can make a decent show great or a good show average. If they're not cheering, they don't care. Why should we? 3. STAR POWER: To quote Vince McMahon, "PPV is an attraction based business". This includes the presence of famous celebrities whom people will pay to see. Wrestlemania is a massive event that demands massive attractions. Don't have them and the show loses its shine. 4. HISTORICAL RELEVANCE: It could be a match, it could be a title change; it could be as small as a single spot or as big as the dawning of a whole new era. Wrestlemania is defined by these moments that go on to impact the history of the industry. Some events had these, others didn't. 5. FEUDS & STORYLINES: All about the booking brother! You cannot just show up to Wrestlemania and expect things to magically come together, this one assesses the build-up to the big event and whether WWE had done their job right in inciting us to want to see it. 6. PRODUCTION VALUE: The image and the "pageantry" of 'Mania has become as big of a part of the overall package as any other. Live music, the set, the colours, video packages, pyro and the image of the live crowd; some Wrestlemania's looked and felt amazing, whilst others could've been another random Monday Night Raw. How much did it look like Wrestlemania? Each of these points has been assessed and scored out of 5 for each individual Wrestlemania. Tally up the total then divide by 6 to get your overall score out of 5 and place them into order by the results. Understandably, there were a few ties as there have been 29 events to date and only 30 points to play with. In the event of those ties, I've tried to place them into order on the base of which was the overall better show. So it wont be entirely free from subjectivity... but hell y'all, neither is Marmite, gay marriage nor sex. The results of this, I hope, is an honestly objective ranking of all 29 prior Wrestlemania events, worst to best. I'm sure there will be some dissent. I can tell you now you'll probably think I've overrated Wrestlemania VII. Underrated? Maybe V or XXIV. You be the judge! Buckle up friends, this goin' get good.
Betting on being a brilliant brother to Bodhi since 2008 (-1 Asian Handicap). Find me @LiamJJohnson on Twitter where you might find some wonderful pearls of wisdom in a stout cocktail of profanity, football discussion and general musings. Or you might not. Depends how red my eyes are.
