WWE WrestleMania 34: 10 Most Insane Things That Happened!

5. The Undertaker Squashes A Tipsy John Cena In Less Than Three Minutes

The Strowchild II
WWE.com

WHO WANTS TO GET WORKED BY ELIAS?

This was magnificent. John Cena's WrestleMania 34 story played out as follows: he sat in different seats throughout the Kickoff and the undercard, somewhat undermining WWE's "record sell-out" ballyhoo, not least because the company again fabricated a further 13,000 (!) people. Cena, new to Hollywood, clearly hasn't chosen the method approach. Every time the camera captured him, he clocked on after a second and reacted to everything with a sort of wild-eyed puzzlement. Then, a referee charged the floor to advise him that his challenge had been answered...

...by, as it turned out, Elias, whose strumming in the dark was a priceless bait-and-switch moment.

When Cena dispatched of him, his real opponent appeared, mercifully not played to the ring by Kid Rock. And then, in a very strange but no less welcome development, the Undertaker squashed him in under three minutes. Cena performed an horrendous bump from 'Taker's big boot, but then again, in the storylines at least, he'd had a few. 'Taker's sit-up spot was a great little moment, mind. So, to summarise, 'Taker defeated a p*ssed-up John Cena in a squash match after interrupting a comedy segment. This was the legendary encounter fans had waited years to see.

Given the limitations of the Dead Man, this was a far better idea than it reads.

Contributor
Contributor

Michael Sidgwick is an editor, writer and podcaster for WhatCulture Wrestling. With over seven years of experience in wrestling analysis, Michael was published in the influential institution that was Power Slam magazine, and specialises in providing insights into All Elite Wrestling - so much so that he wrote a book about the subject. You can order Becoming All Elite: The Rise Of AEW on Amazon. Possessing a deep knowledge also of WWE, WCW, ECW and New Japan Pro Wrestling, Michael’s work has been publicly praised by former AEW World Champions Kenny Omega and MJF, and current Undisputed WWE Champion Cody Rhodes. When he isn’t putting your finger on why things are the way they are in the endlessly fascinating world of professional wrestling, Michael wraps his own around a hand grinder to explore the world of specialty coffee. Follow Michael on X (formerly known as Twitter) @MSidgwick for more!