10 Awful 2013 Films You'll Never Watch Again
7. Hansel And Gretel: Witch Hunters
When I first heard this film was announced, I laughed. When I saw the trailer, I laughed even harder. It is as ridiculous as the title implies, my friends. The industry has started this new trend of picking out old fairy tales and giving them new twists. Whats the main reason, you ask? Easy: because those stories are all in the public domain, which means the studios dont have to pay a single dime for the rights.
The updated tale sees Hansel (Jeremy Renner) and Gretel (Gemma Arterton) as professional witch hunters. Children are being abducted left and right because of a ritual that the witches partake in called Blood Moon, which requires six boys and six girls to complete. So of course, Hansel and Gretel are enlisted to find these witches, kill them, and bring the children back to safety.
Gemma Arterton and Jeremy Renner are both very watchable stars but even they cant save this movie. It never gets past its ridiculously silly premise without fully committing to it either. Its funny when its not supposed to be and it never elicits laughs when it tries. What's worse is, it made enough money to warrant a sequel that is now in development. This is a fairy tale that would have best been left unseen.