4. Two Strangers Will Have An Earth-Shattering Simultaneous Orgasm On The First Try
Notable Offenders: Love & Other Drugs, Titanic We go into movies knowing quite a lot about them these days. We know the stars, we know the story, we basically know how it's all going to go down 9 times out of 10. And we know that if two characters with opposing views on life suddenly hook up, it's going to be hot. And it is. They have literally no things go wrong in the bedroom on the first go ever. They know exactly how this stranger likes it, and my word are they going to give it to them. There are no fumbles or injuries as we reach the piste of the love making, as our two lovers bring each other to a tremor inducing climax. They then split apart, out of breath, and possibly now card-carrying Chlamydia couriers. I call BS on this one. This has surely never happened in the entirety of human history. I'm sorry, it never goes without a hitch first time. And for movies to say so otherwise is a lie. But we need to see it, as we need to believe that two genetically perfect human beings are in fact amazing in bed and make our self-loathing even more unbearable. And of course my biggest bugbear with these scenes? That the woman has an orgasm, despite the fact I have it on good authority that they can't orgasm. Right?