4. The Blair Witch Project (1999)
Speaking of things that we are so over, this was found-footage-revolutionary back in the day. Remember that this was years before Paranormal Activity supposedly rocked our world. It was a terrifying-run-through-the-woods before Cabin in the Woods and before the remake of The Last House on the Left. It was evil long-lasting before The Last Possession joined the lazy storytelling hordes blaming everything on Satanist grandmothers. The premise was okay. No one hates an in-over-their-head set of characters at the beginning. Yes, we all hoped they'd die horrible deaths, but we hoped they'd solve a mystery and at least one person would make it out alive. Let's start with something I just said a few words ago. We hoped they would solve a mystery. You never want to have more mysteries than you have cast members. There were the freaky signs of witchcraft in the woods that were in a tightening circle around the moronic filmmakers. There was the person who disappeared with a bodily organ the only hint that he might have already died. There was the serial killer whose reign of terror was an urban legend. There was the Blair Witch herself, who is never actually seen but feared pretty universally. Do any of these mysteries get solved? Well, yeah, we see a dead guy held hostage in the style of the serial killer. So we know the serial killer is somehow true. We think. Maybe? What's that, you say? This is about the Blair Witch? Oh, yeah... well... um... The scary thing about this movie is that the cult popularity netted the idiots in charge $10,931 for every dollar they spent. If only we could unleash them on cancer research fund-raising.