10 Reasons Future Movie Fans Will Definitely Ridicule 2013

8. Jack The Giant Slayer

ewan mcgregor jack the giant slayer Following the well-established trend of Hollywood adapting movies from fairy tales with little to no success, the powers that be, in their infinite wisdom, decided to adapt the tale of Jack, who sold a cow for some magic beans, climbed the resulting beanstalk and stole a goose that laid golden eggs. What's not to love about that story? Typically, Hollywood went darker and older, and reimagined the story somewhat to make it fit with modern audiences, who are always climbing beanstalks and fighting wars with giants apparently. Why So Ridiculous? Jack The Giant Slayer cost an enormous amount of money, and is the kind of shoddy final product that makes you suspect that sometimes Hollywood is no more than a front for laundering money. How on Earth anyone could justify spending so much money on a film that so fundamentally misunderstands its primary selling point. The clue should have been in the title - and specifically in the word "Giant" - which should have been used as the pitch to bring in as many fantasy-loving audience members as possible. And to a degree, the marketing campaign did as required, suggesting we were going to see a Giant Wars movie that just might be worth seeing. But then, probably because a massive seven different parties worked on them, the effects turned out to be awful. They're off-putting, but impossible to ignore, because they make up 80% of the film's substance, and all in all, they're less successful than the cartoon version of the BFG that came out way back in 1989. It's this type of money-wasting in cinema that allows the bleeding hearts to spout their outrage that actors wages are so high, and films cost so much during the dreaded recession we're in. That's why the movie deserves to be ridiculed - that and many other reasons.
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