10 Ridiculous Complaints About Upcoming Movies That Need To Die

6. It Won't Be True Enough To The Books - Fifty Shades Of Grey

There are two schools of thinking on Fifity Shades Of Grey: it will either be a sloppy mess with sanitised porn sequences and a terrible script, or it will be a rip-roaring raunchy affair that lives up to the book's lofty levels of lust. Only one of these stances is correct (it's not the second one, obviously), but criticising the film for not being outright porn is silliness. How could it be? Have we learned nothing from Showgirls? The best cinematic sex happens mostly in the minds of the audience, and seeing anything as graphic as the Fifty Shades books suggested isn't going to look anything like as romanticised as it was in the readers' imaginations. But in that contradiction lies the problem for the film: the book's primary demographic was an army of readers who sought sexual arousal as much as a good story (the low quality of the writing proves as much) and there will be some expectations of rudeness. Sadly for the voracious appetites of some audience members, it's not going to deliver, but it couldn't possibly ever have in the first place thanks to the restrictions of censorship and classification.