3. The Wicker Man (Neil LaBute)
Neil LaBute again proves that he shouldn't be allowed to remake anything with his risible take on the Robin Hardy classic slow-burn thriller The Wicker Man. The original revelled in Edward Woodward's increasing suspicions about the case of a missing child he was investigating on the island, building to a shocking twist ending that remains one of the most horrific and superbly played in cinematic history. The LaBute version is basically a campy pantomime, a laugh riot that completely bungles the serious material. Nicolas Cage claims that his ridiculous performance is intentionally bad, though it's hard to tell when he spends a good portion of the film running around in a bear suit, beating up waifish women, and screaming "Not the bees! The bees! Ahhhhhhhhhhh!" Either way, the film is a horrible, arguably misogynistic mess, and Hardy has completely distanced himself from it.