5. Catwoman - All the Action (2004)
http://youtu.be/mmjyV2Z7wLw Though many will decry Pitof's horrendous Catwoman for its dodgy plot and ropey acting, for me the most distractingly horrible aspect of it is the head-smackingly poor visual effects. As a visual effects supervisor first and foremost, it's clear that the director has a lot of faith and investment in CGI, hence him using it here in completely unnecessary circumstances for just about every stunt possible, even those which would be easily achievable by, you know, those ellusive things called stuntwomen. If you can sit through the mind-meltingly inane soundtrack long enough to get to the "goods", you'll observe Halle Berry's character leaping up walls in a scarcely watchable blur, flipping around in what can barely be construed as a human form, before performing a physically ludicrous backflip - even accepting her "power" - and finally, without CGI, kicking the bad guy's asses. Still, Pitof can't resist to show off the terrible effects once more, as Selina Ky-err, Patience Phillips, rides one of the cronies like a surfboard, incredulously jumping off with a CGI twirl - rather than, you know, just jumping off a skateboard or something - and then diving after another enemy, where her faces actually changes shape during the leap and doesn't even really resemble a human. Yes, really.
Shaun Munro
Contributor
Frequently sleep-deprived film addict and video game obsessive who spends more time than is healthy in darkened London screening rooms. Follow his twitter on @ShaunMunroFilm or e-mail him at shaneo632 [at] gmail.com.
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