10 Things You'll Never Believe Are Being Made Into Movies

4. Stretch Armstrong

What Is It?: A muscle-bound action figure with arms that could be stretched up to around four feet in length. And It's Weird Because...?: It's a toy that's basically already been covered in the world of cinema anyway by The Fantastic Four's Mr. Fantastic. Granted, Nicholas Stoller (Get Him to the Greek, The Muppets) has worked on the screenplay, and the news that Chris Pine is replacing Taylor Lautner as the lead is certainly relieving, but is a movie about a stretchy man really what we want to see, especially when he needs a small child to help him stretch? Granted, it could make decent use of 3D, but with another Fantastic Four movie on the way, I can't really bring myself to care for this one beyond a sense of morbid fascination. At present, Breck Eisner is directing, and the film is tipped for an April 11, 2014 release date.
 
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Frequently sleep-deprived film addict and video game obsessive who spends more time than is healthy in darkened London screening rooms. Follow his twitter on @ShaunMunroFilm or e-mail him at shaneo632 [at] gmail.com.