7. Don't Get Covered In Alien Goo
Spider-Man 3 is like a pizza made by an indecisive chef with impulse problems there is far too much topping and no distinctive flavour. Commonly lauded as the worst Spider-Man movie of all time, the film had its perks but it committed numerous sins along the way, the most glaring of all being the undeniable miscasting of Topher Grace as Eddie Brock. There is, however, another scene that rivals Grace for the worst thing about Spider-Man 3 and consecutively provides us with another moment of Spider-Man the asshole; the dance number. Peter Parker is unaware that the alien goo which enhances his abilities is actually a symbiote that is altering him emotionally, turning him into a horrible douche bag with an emo fringe, i.e. yourself when you were a teenager. Honestly, this entire portion of the film is absolutely suffocating with moments worthy of deeming Spider-Man an asshole who constantly dances to a jazzy song that only he can hear, but it is the main dance scene that takes the cake, eats it, barfs it up and then cooks another cake with the result. In this scene, Peter takes Gwen Stacy to a jazz club that MJ works at so that he can show Gwen off to his ex. With an extremely forced swagger, he spouts lines like, "You are really gonna dig this joint" and "Youre lookin fine, babe, love that giggle", because Spider-Man is now a pimp from the seventies. To top it all off, Parker ends up interrupting MJs solo number in order to perform a dance routine which makes Ron Burgundys flute playing look humble and not obnoxious in the slightest. He snaps his fingers, thrusts his hips and, to put the cherry on top of the asshole sundae, throws his coat at MJ. I cant even begin to describe how loathsome Peter is in this scene, so I recommend watching the video for yourself. Apologies in advance for the hole that youre about to punch in your screen. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U883K-W77ZY