10 Totally Inept Movie Criminals

by Shaun Munro

1. Chad Feldheimer - Burn After Reading

Burn After Reading

That facial expression says it all, really; here is a man completely not cut out for a life of crime, and the Coen Brothers bring this to our attention again in immensely uproarious fashion in the superb Burn After Reading. Chad (Brad Pitt, who gives a cracking, against-type performance) is a dumbass gym employee who mistakes a CD containing divorce and financial information of a CIA employee to be secret government info.

Along with co-worker Linda Litzke (Frances McDormand), they plan to blackmail the agent in question, Osbourne Cox (John Malkovich) to buy the disc back, and use the money for Linda to have cosmetic surgery.

Chad ends up sneaking into Cox's house to dish up more dirt on him, but at the same time, U.S. Marshall Harry Pfarrer (George Clooney) is also snooping around the house. He is surprised by Chad, and after he pulls the ridiculous expression above, Pfarrer ends up shooting him dead.

Can you think of any greater criminal ineptitude in cinema history? Let us know in the comments below.

 
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Frequently sleep-deprived film addict and video game obsessive who spends more time than is healthy in darkened London screening rooms. Follow his twitter on @ShaunMunroFilm or e-mail him at shaneo632 [at] gmail.com.