10 Ways 90s Teen Movies Lied To Us

7. Nothing Matters More Than Losing Your Virginity

A quest so ingrained into the DNA of the nineties teen movie that, after a while, the sexual frustration built up to such a dangerous level that it ended up exploding and filling up the ninety-minute run time of a feature length film. American Pie is one of the stalwarts of genre, an undisputed classic of adolescent cinema which also heralded the return of the Porkies-style gross out comedy. Were it not for American Pie, we almost certainly wouldn't have the wave of Apatow films right now, some of which €“ namely Superbad €“ continue to the tradition of the nineties teen movie on into the 21st century. It also reaffirms the most important thing about being a teenager, which often gets lost amongst the chaste romances and popularity contest others tried to push. No, the most important part of the high school experience is getting laid. American Pie isn't the only film to feature this as a central tenant, but it's definitely the zenith of that particular lesson. It's literally the plot of the film. Jason Biggs and his dorky mates all make a pact that they're going to pop their cherries, by hook or by crook (or by cherry-based pastry dishes) before they all go off to college. To not is utterly unthinkable. Virginity is a self-destructive albatross to wear around your neck when you enter the adult world of university, beginning a horrible cycle wherein you can't convince anyone to have sex with you because you've never had sex, meaning you can never convince anyone to have sex with you for the first time, meaning you will be a virgin forever. That's kind of an unhealthy mind set, nineties teen movies. Not to mention a total lie. Losing your virginity happens whenever you're ready. You've probably got better things to be doing, and you'll have more of a chance to when you've left high school, anyway.