10 Worst Movies Ever Released In January

1. Texas Chainsaw 3D

paul blart
Lionsgate

Release Date: 4 January 2013

Why It’s Bad: Rebooting the franchise (again), this movie positions itself as a sequel to Tobe Hooper’s surprisingly bloodless The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, which is ironic – all this brain damaged cash-in wants to do is take a bunch of stupid and unsympathetic characters and show them being carved up in glorious 3D.

As usual, a six-foot five-inch chainsaw enthusiast in a mask made from human skin is able to sneak around without causing suspicion, creep up on his victims and, in one scene, chase our heroine through a funfair without eliciting so much as a surprised gasp. The redneck troopers are all graduates of the Wicker Man school of detecting, which means they wander alone through the House Of Bloody Death and say, “I’m gettin’ a bad feeling here!” as they discover a corpse in the freezer.

What The Critics Said: “The original Texas Chainsaw Massacre leaves audiences feeling hollowed out, dispirited and dissolute. Texas Chainsaw 3D is simply a bummer for being a big nothing.” (LA Times)

Contributor

Ian Watson is the author of 'Midnight Movie Madness', a 600+ page guide to "bad" movies from 'Reefer Madness' to 'Poultrygeist: Night of the Chicken Dead.'