3. E.T. 2: Nocturnal Fears
Now we're just getting ridiculous; this has to be a joke, right? Unfortunately not. After E.T. became a massive critical and commercial success, the producers just couldn't help themselves, prepping a sequel in which E.T. figured very little. Mere weeks after E.T. came out, a short treatment was ready by Spielberg and the original film's writer Melissa Mathison, which featured albino aliens who otherwise resemble E.T. arriving on Earth in search of him. However, these aliens are evil and don't like E.T. - whose real name is actually Zrek - but after failing to locate him, decide to goof around on Earth instead. They kill local wildlife with their powers, and upon realising that Elliot and his family know something about "Zrek", take them to their spaceship, where they are tortured - yes, in a sequel to the family classic we all know and love - for information. E.T. makes his only appearance at the end, saving the kids and the day, before again vanishing off into space. Sense eventually prevailed, thank God, with Spielberg deciding that "a sequel to E.T. would do nothing but rob the original of its virginity". Oh how true he was; this sequel sounded like it had none of the majesty of the original film, but plenty of idiocy instead.