20 Problems Only Cannes Film Festival Attendees Will Understand

When the security on the red carpet do their job, they're great, stopping crazy people from attacking Jay Baruchel outside screenings, but the majority of the bouncers aren't given those high-end responsibilities. 

Instead they're given fetching matching beige suits and told never to give any hint that they're genuinely human (or have anything but disdain for film critics). They'll make you queue longer than necessary, bottle-neck queues to make sure the angriest people's elbows are in swinging distance of your genitals and questioning their authority in any way is basically a death sentence.

They might well be very nice people, but you have to question their job satisfaction if that's how their faces look most of the time.