2. Theodore Rex (1995)
The world had been itching for a buddy cop movie pairing a dinosaur and Whoopi Goldberg, so it's a good thing
Theodore Rex came along when it did. This whacked-out nightmare of Jurassic/human relations is the kind of film that should have ended the careers of absolutely everyone involved, but it was only director Jonathan R. Betuel who went extinct after its release in '95. The plot (apologies for the use of that word) concerns a police detective and her new partner - the stupid, annoying tyrannosaurus of the film's title - as they try and solve the murder of... other dinosaurs? This is the prime example of a "paycheck movie" - that's a movie that a renound actor will take on purely for the cash, despite how crazy the shit they have to do seems (see: Nicholas Cage). For obvious reasons of moral conduct,
Theodore Rex couldn't be made in America, so the film was funded with some mysterious German money (must've been a hell of a pitch). The aesthetics of the strange, futuristic world that the characters inhabit are a kind of cross between that of the godawful
Super Mario Bros. movie and the actually great TV show
Dinosaurs. As you'd expect there are dozens of horrific one-liners, awful special effects and the worst jokes ever put on celluloid. Theodore Rex really likes cookies, for example, and tells everybody that he does at different points in the movie. Really funny.