Theres a name that, if uttered, will turn the hardest of men into quivering sponges who wade in a pool full of their own tears as they come to terms with their own mortality. This person has bested Marvels elite, from the likes of Doctor Doom and Wolverine, to Deadpool and MODOK. She even took a selfie atop the unconscious body of Galactus. Who is powerful enough to defeat such heavy hitters? Why, Squirrel Girl, of course. No one is safe from the clutches of Squirrel Girl, aka The Slayer of All That Breathes. Blessed with squirrel-like powers, such as buck teeth that can chew wood and the ability to communicate with squirrels, a lot of heroes and villains alike have underestimated her, only to fall beneath her might. Thanos included. Squirrel Girl not only managed to defeat the Avatar of Death, but she did it in the most embarrassing way possible within a comic book; she beat him off panel. This one-sided affair was so brutal that the artist was unable to fathom the sheer amount of violence required to show Squirrel Girl dispatching Thanos, so they opted to keep their sanity and only illustrate the aftermath. Just to ensure that there was no second guessing as to who is truly the most powerful being in the Marvel Universe, The Watcher showed up to validate that, indeed, this was the real Thanos and not a clone or robot double. Need more proof that Thanos is an established badass who will be more than a match for the combined Marvel Cinematic Universe? He took this beating and lived to tell the tale. How It Would Work In Infinity War: Look, if Squirrel Girl were to feature in Infinity War, a few things would happen. Her power set is so broken that every single character included that does not have squirrel powers will immediately be rendered moot. Robert Downey Jr. won't receive top billing anymore and will pull out, muttering about losing money while driving off in his car that is made out of pure gold and is fueled by the tears of starving orphans. And Thanos will end up being a laughable opponent, because the only person that can beat Squirrel Girl is... s***. Instead, Thanos could briefly mention his defeat to Squirrel Girl in passing when giving a lecture to the heroes about the futility of challenging him. 'There is no one on this planet, this galaxy, the entire universe, who will be able to stop me. Except for the one with the teeth. But we do not talk about the one with the teeth.'
