8. Stellan Skarsgard
In all seriousness, if Alexander Skarsgard were to play Christian Grey, it would be totally hot. But if his father, Stellan, was cast in the role? It would totally be not. Not. NOT, I SAY! Because really, what do you think of when you hear the name of Alexander Skarsgard? You think of sexy vampires, right? And when you think of Stellan... ? Well, I'll tell you what I think of. Squidmen in the Pirates of the Caribbean movies. The serial killer from The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo. And the piece de resistance, that weird farmer guy in Dogville that rapes Nicole Kidman. There are many, many, many moments that I wish I could forget when I (for some reason) watch Lars Von Trier's films, and that's in the top five. I'm sure in real life the elder Skarsgard is a nice and normal man, but oy, is he often typecast as an icky weirdo.