OWF's DVD/Blu-Ray Picks: 5th July: PERCY JACKSON, HACHI, BEYOND THE POLE and VAMPIRE

Every week I will bring you reviews of my home video picks of the week, as well as a round-up of pretty much everything else that is released at the same time. Don€™t be shy if you are from the U.S. as the column is still interesting for you as a quick snippets of what I think of these movies and hopefully they will help you decide whether to Netflix, or make a purchase on a movie you might have missed in the cinema€™s.

Not a huge amount of high quality home market releases this week, so a relatively pretty brief column compared to others. The big names for the week are Percy Jackson & The Olympians: The Lightning Thief (and that's one big name) and Richard Gere's Disney-flavoured take on an Eastern legend in the shape of Hachi: A Dog's Tale. Elsewhere, Brit-flick Beyond the Pole is available, along with suspiciously Avatar-like animation Battle for Terra and shlock-horror flick Vampire. Bringing up the rear in fine fashion are the excellent Ashes to Ashes Complete Boxset and Stargate Universe Season 1, as well as Blu-Ray treatments for Predator, in time for the big-screen re-appearance of the dread-locked hunter and HBO's superlative Generation Kill.

We also have a treat for those of you who buy your DVDs from the bargain bins. Read on for more...FeaturesPercy Jackson & The Olympians: The Lightning Thief new to DVD and Blu-Ray

You might already know what I think about this film, thanks to the cinematic review I offered when it first hit big screens earlier in the year, but for those of you who didn't catch it I'll summarise (but seriously, you should all have followed that handy link back there by now anyway). I was torn watching it between the inner teen in me who was impressed with the story and characters, and the adult/critic who saw way too many plot holes and chaotic direction choices that rather blunted the good points. The film will enjoy a DVD boost thanks to the legion of fans who are familiar with Percy's world from the hugely popular book series, and at the end of the day the film does provide easy weekend entertainment: I just fear we have all been spoiled by the gloss of the Harry Potter adaptations to take settling for lower quality offerings to our hearts without complaint.

Hachi: A Dog's Tale new to DVD and Blu-Ray

Perhaps better called Hachi: A Dog's Dinner, this family-aimed "tear-jerker" really aims squarely at the fans that Marley & Me left in a crumpled, teary heap, but misses the simple target of being universally entertaining. Those innumerate souls who enjoyed bawling their hearts out at the various Dog-Misery classics already available will no doubt find a kindred, if not exactly polished, filmic sibling in the shape of Richard Gere's latest DVD release. For anyone else like me who don't really go in for all of that animal love, Hachi is just too manipulative and the scenes designed to offer some kind of gravitas to the relationship (in order no doubt to disguise that manipulation) just don't offer enough to make me think otherwise. There is something very Made-For-TV about it, thanks to the apparently intentional blandness (no-one can be that dull by accident!), and Richard Gere's deference to actually acting in favour of just playing with the canine star Akita. The one redeeming fact is that Hachi isn't unforgivably schmaltzy, I just don't get why anyone would be attracted to it, when it so obviously intends only to make people cry.

Vampire new to DVD

Vampire certainly offers something a little different to what we have so far been given in the vampire genre. The synopsis reads a little like this: The pursuit of a serial killer leads to a deeper evil: when the government captures a vampire he is imprisoned and subjected to brutal medical experimentat the hands of a shady military organisation, in order to find the source of his power. As the procedures becomes more gruesome, the project's lead doctor is torn between sympathy for a patient's suffering and concern for the evil that threatens to consume everyone involved.

Sadly, the film is a bit of a split personality monster. When it is good it's good, but when it's bad it's a bloody nightmare. And not the good kind. Much of what Vampire offers is actually pretty good (somewhat surprisingly); it is often intriguing, and even occasionally sophisticated, and indeed almost offering something new for the vampire fans. But then everything good is sullied by unfortunate concessions to formula: hackneyed plot devices, vampiric cliches (especially with the lead vampire character, who is all long coat, English accent and bedraggled black hair), and the kind of sloppy filmmaking you might have been forgiven for presuming of the film before viewing.

The frustrating thing is, with the overall idea, Vampire had a real chance: there is a lot of potential under the cape. But thanks to some seriously bad acting, an over-adherence to cliche and some terrible film-making on low-end equipment, that potential is lost and the film becomes no more than a massive pain in the neck. It's draining... Well, you get the puns.

Incidentally, the biggest problem Vampire will face is its name. I dare you to try and find it on Amazon right now- just type in the title (even putting in the year it came out- 2002- fails to bring it up on IMDB). Thanks to the Twilight explosion, there are a million and one DVDs with a vampire flavour, and Vampire is now competing for space with all of them. So, unless you know the specifics, it will be nigh impossible to stumble across this particular addition to the genre. They may perhaps have had more joy sticking with the original title (despite being terrible) Demon Under Glass.

Predator- Ultimate Hunter Edition new to Blu-Ray

The Danny Glover starring, city-set sequel may well be best left forgotten, and the AVP spin-offs may have basically pissed all over the original's spirit and credentials, but Predator remains one of the best sci-fi actioners to ever hit cinemas, and it is certainly the highlight of Mr Arnold Schwarznegger's Action Period BC (Before Comedy). What a shame that is has, up until now, been a terribly mistreated franchise at the hands of the unwise and the unworthy: mistreatment that continued when Predator was originally released to Blu-Ray, thanks to a sloppy, too-slow transfer that left the film looking like shit. Thankfully, the Ultimate Hunter Edition offers a whole new experience, thanks to the brand-new digital restoration that gives the classic a fresh zing compared to the original and the first Blu-Ray offering that will entice fans new and old and make them hope the Rodriguez project works out for the best. But that isnt the end of the story- the transfer could still do with a lot of additional work- with some scenes making the actors look like they went to the same Botox doctor that the Red Heat Blu-Ray treatment went through. Blu-Ray treatment people need to learn quick that excessive Digital Noise Reduction is not the best way to present the best high-definition experience for fans of the format- the proces merely robs the film of all grain, which might appear to sound good, but makes everyone look plastic and soulless. The problems make the use of the word Ultimate in the title a little laughable (as do the seen it all before Extras).

Beyond the Pole new to DVD and Blu-Ray

The long and short of it is that Beyond the Pole is an endearing British comedy that somehow manages to be likeable without ever really making you laugh out loud: the absurdist adventures of two under-trained British men seeking to complete the world's first carbon neutral, organic, vegetarian polar expedition has a good heart that makes the ending work really quite on an emotional level. The problem is the script that never really knows where it is going tonally, doesnt hit the humour high-notes that it should of and is rather shown-up by the clearly improvised comedy scenes that make you smile rather than guffaw. Still, the documentary-making process is spoofed quite cleverly and the two leads - Stephen Mangan and Rhys Thomas are very likeable. It's not profound cinema, despite deeper hidden messages related to personal responsibility, but it is gently enjoyable movie.

Cargo new to DVD and Blu-Ray

So, Switzerland have an active film industry. Who knew?! I won't give away too many plot details, as to do so would spoil the film, thanks to its close similarity to another movie. Basically Cargo is centred on a utopian escape from an Earth that is slowly killing itself: the central character Laura attempts to pay for her own passage to the Utopian planet by working as a medic on a cargo ship and begins to suspect something is up. It meshes the Matrix with Avatar, and draws lightly from the same pool as Moon and Event Horizon to offer a not unreasonable sci-fi/horror offering. There's also a bit of Pandorum and Sunshine thrown in there for good measure, with the film's near relentlessly boring tone coming close to the central idea of space-monotony that Boyle's sci-fier offers, which is not helped by the criminal under-development of all characters besides the lead: okay, so it is a little confused, and the reveal comes way too early in the film's run, but it is still a largely likeable film. As with all small-budgeted European films, Cargo was inevitably and somewhat cripplingly given the "ground-breaking sci-fi" label that will ultimately do it more harm than is good. The horror is very much of a gentler psychological kind than some hardcores will be familiar and happy with and it pretty much disappears as the narrative prgresses, but at its heart the film is an enjoyable experience, even if it does rip off a larger, more familair sci-fi movie that I may or may not have mentioned above (and suffers badly by comparison).

Battle for Terra new to DVD

Listen to this. When the peaceful, ecology-loving inhabitants of the planet Terra come under attack from humans in search of a new home and new natural resources to plunder, the friendship between a human pilot and an alien girl blossoms and becomes the key to both races' survival. Err, hang on... isn't that the one with the blue tall people and the robots from Aliens? Well, either way, they're both just showy rip-offs of Fern Gully anyway.

Battle For Terra's animation is clearly underfunded compared to cash-rich competitors like Pixar and Dreamworks, with a lack of polish or refinement in its visuals that makes it a little difficult to take its oh-so-serious aspirations very seriously. That means that the good-natured, eco-friendly sentiment comes off as rather too preachy (a feature that Avatar's visuals made far more palletable on that particular project, though not entirely) and unfortunately just too earnestly message-lead to be genuinely appealing to the children's market.

The Blu-Ray edition is presumably to follow, having already been granted its stateside release already.

TV BoxsetsStargate Universe Complete Season 1 new to DVD and Blu-Ray

I was monumentally put off the Stargate franchise by Atlantis and parts of the SG1 Tv series, having initially fallen head long in love with the movie way back in the dark days of the 90s, so the news that there was to be a new spin-off show didn't exactly fill me with unbound joy. But, I have been about as pleasantly surprised as I could ever have imaged with Stargate Universe- the darker, more grown up new offering. While it has been disparagingly held up as a lightweight Battestar Galactica bastardisation, I don't think there can be anyhigher praise: the fact that the shows makers are aiming at that kind of longevity of appeal at the very least has got to be good news for the ongoing quality of subsequent seasons. There is definitely a bit of Lost in the philosophy of the show and the way it reveals and develops characters, and the Star Trek Voyager style Mission Home is now quite familiar, but thanks to a strong central performance by Robert Carlyle makes the sci-fi resonate on a far more human level than STV ever managed.

Ashes to Ashes Series 3 and Complete Boxset

The best British drama for many a year? Check. The best British character creation for a similar time period? Definitely. Ashes to Ashes, like predecessor Life on Mars is all about Philip Glenister's charismatic, delightfully politically incorrect Gene Hunt- one of the most quotable creations to have graced screens since David Brent hung up his goatee beard. In this 80s set follow up to the John Simm lead predecessor, the added bonus is that we get to see a different dynamic between the lead characters now that his partner in crime Alex is a lady. If there's one thing to criticise it's the rather blatant, and unnecessary in-show hero worship of Hunt, which can get a little grating at times: but at the end of the day three series tells its own tale. it's fun, it's a nailed-on 80s commentary and it is resplendent with gloriously painted characters. It's a winner in my book.

Generation Kill new to Blu-Ray

HBO have a habit of making ground-breaking shows that end up widely heralded as TV events and landmarks, and Generation Kill keeps up the company's enviable batting average. The seven part mini-series is terrifically bold and uncompromising and upholds an impeccable dignity eeven despite its often profane, coarse and irreverent marines, and it never needlessly embellishes the facts with fanfares and overly emotive music. It takes the best elements of Band of Brothers- the comaraderie between comrades predominantly- and resets it in Iraq in 2003 to stunning effect and mercilessly without cliche, with the base of a fantastic script and great performances. It's gold. And on Blu-Ray the experience is even more beautiful: the transfer is brilliant, retaining the necessary grain and detail of the original thanks to a lack of the over-gloss that is too often sneaking into the high-def transfer process at the expense of quality and integrity. It is enormously comforting to see that HBO are continuing their attention to quality in their Blu-Ray releases, with Generation Kill joining True Blood as remarkable examples of how achieving the full Blu-Ray experience should be done.

Elsewhere two cult British TV shows from widely different eras get their first-time DVD releases. Firstly, the mega-iconic terrestrial sci-fier Doctor Who sees yet another volumised release hit shelves- this time Series 5 Vol 2 which is new to both DVD and the Blu-Ray format. I've said it once and I shall say it again, Doctor Who does not appeal to me in the slightest, and I openly despise any franchise that has such little concern for its fans that it volumises all releases, putting them out mere weeks apart and then offering a complete boxset within another small amount of time. Red Dwarf was much better before its reprisal: I prefer to have my sci-fi either super-slick (which the Americans do best) or self-conciously cheaply produced, like RD was in the good old days. Doctor Who misses out on both accounts, and loses further points for aiming at a family audience, where no successful sci-fi project should ever set its sights.

Second of the Brit classics is The Avengers Series 4, the iconic black and white 60s TV series that partly inspired the world of Austin Powers and paved the way for pretty much every British caricature ever seen on American film since. If only the Bond series could have kept the same kind of essential British-ness, the franchise's backers might not have had to have a crisis of confidence and we might not all now be forced to wait for the latest addition. It is still a huge pity that the programme's legacy will forever be marred by the hugely-caned big-screen remake starring Ralph Fiennes and Uma Thurman (not forgetting a bewigged Sean Connery on hamtastic form). Still, if enough people buy the boxsets we can all start to forget about that modern silliness...

Oh, and for anyone who hasn't yet got sick of the sight of them, the entire Friends collection of boxsets will be released in Extended Editions, promising Exclusive and Unseen material.

The DVD Dump-Bin

Every week, along with the DVD titles that appear in the usual Picks post, I end up watching some films I simply wouldn't wish on anyone. However, since you all asked so nicely, and since I'm one of those perverse types who actually seeks bad films to watch occassionally, I thought I'd share some of the worst of the worst. And hopefully we can club together and have them condemned forever to the big DVD dump-bin in the sky.

First of, we have "comedy" Post Grad starring Michael Keaton and Jane Lynch alongside that Alexis Bledel from TV's smug, angrifying Gilmore Girls- never heard of it? There's bloody good reason. Keaton and Lynch should know better judging by former glories (or Glee-ful current ones in Lynch's case) than to sign on to projects like this. Perhaps they were drawn in by the not-bad premise of a student forced to move back home after college to her dysfunctional family- it certainly cant have been the woeful script. In the end, the "comedy" is excrutiatingly bad, and never works, and the central idea and strong-looking cast are both wasted thanks to lack-lustre, misguided direction and a script as weak as an American Pie high-numbered sequel (which are all incidentally available today in the Complete American Pie 1-7 Collection). Even worse is the film seems to have quirky indie aspirations, which end up sos badly delivered that everything about the film quickly begins to inspire murderous annoyance. Avoid it unless you're a glutton for punishment.

Coming in second, (if you'll pardon the horrible pun) is Bikini Girls on Ice. This is not the first Bikini Girls project- the others are actually porn, as far as I can tell, with Bikini Girls on Dinosaur Island winning the intriguing name competition, but in all honesty this film should just have done with it and be called Slashy Titty Slash Tits or something. The obvious cult-aspirations are appallingly misjudged: the film looks like a shitty metal band's attempt at a narrative-lead music video, which they had a budget of £8.50 to make, so they turned the lights off and employed some busty girls to "act" their way through some shoddy scenes before a maniac chops them up. At least the pornos had a reason for the lack of finesse.

And finally, dishonourable must go to Undead, a crayon-by-numbers zombie/meteor attack flick that is almost as offensively bad as they come, and which gets the nod thanks to Amazon's hilarious decision to slash the price from a jaw-droppingly optimistic 16.99 to a still-way-too-much-but-more-justified £3.93. I also can't ignore the fact that one of the main characters is played by a guy called Mungo McKay.
Contributor
Contributor

WhatCulture's former COO, veteran writer and editor.