Sylvester Stallone: 5 Awesome Performances And 5 That Sucked

And 5 That Sucked...

5. Judge Dredd - Judge Dredd (1995)

The night I went to see Judge Dredd I was so cheesed off with the film that I went out afterwards and got spectacularly falling-down comedy drunk. I was found sitting on the side of the bath, asleep, with my head in the sink, by my mother. And that experience was still more enjoyable than this awful waste of a film. You could say that he€™s hopelessly miscast, and taking off the helmet inside the first 10 minutes was considered sacrilege by fans, but the real problem is that Stallone just plays Dredd as any another action hero. He€™s lonely, he€™s violent, but really he€™s misunderstood, a great guy who loves to snog the ladies. No he isn€™t, he€™s a fascistic judge dispensing justice in a police state, and even though it€™s only been written down before, I doubt very much he says €œI AMMM THE LOORRRE€ like he€™s just come back from the dentists. The only reason he isn€™t the worst thing in it is because of €˜comedy futuristic criminal sidekick€™ (trademark) Rob Schneider. But that€™s a bit like saying falling out of a 21st floor window is better than falling out of a 22nd floor window. A great man said in 2008 that the real fault of the film was €œabout wasting such great potential€. That man was Sylvester Stallone. Tell you what Sly, I could have told you that 13 years previous, sitting on the side of my mum's bath.
Contributor
Contributor

I'm a Westcountry exile now living in Yorkshire with lovely wife and cats (also lovely). I'm a big fan of films, robots, timetravel, and films about timetravelling robots, as well as lots of other action, sci-fi and comedy. I'm currently trying to write a sitcom that doesn't involve robots, and I also blog nonsense on timolsky.blogspot.com. Thanks for taking the time to read my stuff, and feel free to comment.