What Your Favourite Star Wars Movie Says About You

6. Star Wars: Episode III - Revenge of the Sith (2005)

Revenge of the SithThe Movie: It€™s faint praise to call it the best loved of the prequels, but Sith is more than just the king of the kiddie table. This is the one where Lucas wised up, realizing the tech was the best thing the new trilogy had going for it- how else do you explain a completely CG-villain who€™s shtick is having four lightsabers? Even though it€™s wrapping up three movies, Sith is almost too climactic, with the last 45 minutes or so turning into a big, glowing, senate seat-spinning blur. But there€™s some solid payoff to the character arcs along the way, with Anakin finally calling Obi Wan on his contradictory BS, and Obi Wan taking the high road by chopping off three of his best friend€™s limbs. Sure, it has the luxury of reaping all that was sown over the course of Phantom Menace and Attack of the Clones, but Sith also takes measures to be the least offensive prequel in general, featuring a near complete absence of politics, angsty romance, and Jar Jar. Star Wars fans were sufficiently amused€ but thought the Chewbacca cameo was as forced as it was stupid. What It Says About You: You€™re a completist and you like to see things through to the end. You watched all of Heroes and Prison Break, and read every Wheel of Time book. You even acknowledge the existence of the Matrix sequels. Quitting is for losers and whiners, advice you shout at Yoda every time he chickens out during the big fight with Palpatine. Knowing the whole picture means you€™re better equipped to judge its individual components, and when looking at the rest of the saga, Sith reigns supreme. Yes, the original movies have a cheesy charm, but you can only appreciate puppets at arms length, and whenever Luke talks, all you hear is The Joker. You think people are overreacting a little bit when they favorably compare fiery castration to watching Phantom Menace and Attack of the Clones; they weren€™t amazing, movies but hey, you€™ve got to eat your vegetables to fully appreciate dessert. You are not rationalizing your investment in a subpar product; the ending for Lost made sense to you, and you know for a fact that the last seasons of Dexter and How I Met Your Mother will be totally worth it. Favourite Star Wars Accessories: R2D2 coloured Xbox 360, loaded with a copy of Star Wars: The Force UnleashedSoundbite: €œNo pain, no gain. Want to go lift in my basement and watch season two of The Killing?€ Favourite Movies: The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King, Saw 3D
Contributor
Contributor

If it can be written about, Sam will write about it. He's got a degree in biology for some reason, probably because The Thing gave him the impression that wildlife research is mostly about getting drunk with Kurt Russell, and using flamethrowers (it isn't). He lives in Toronto, and almost met Dan Aykroyd that one time.