The Wolverine: 15 Stupid Things To Avoid Doing In Real Life

10. Speed + Body of Water = Death

Pool Mariko, the women Wolverine sleeps with while he is supposed to be protecting her, is engaged to a corrupt scumbag of a politician, Noburo Mori. Wolverine finds him in his penthouse suite, semi-naked with two hot women doing what can only be described as €˜€™frolicking.€™€™ Annoyed at the disrespect Mori has for Mariko, Wolverine takes the moral high ground and asks him that since he is engaged, shouldn€™t he be above threesomes with hot models? It was obvious that Wolverine had grown quite fond of Mori€™s fiance, especially after he just slept with her, so he was going to be damned if he allowed Mori to disrespect her like that, right? So after interrogating him, Wolverine throws him over the balcony. "Has he killed him?" the audience wonders. Not very heroic to throw an unarmed man that posed no threat, 30 floors to his death. But relax: the complex€™s swimming pool broke Mori€™s fall so Wolverine doesn't come off as a heartless murderer. Yukio, who witnessed the whole event, asks Wolverine: €˜€™How did you know there was a pool down there?€™€™ to which he replies, "I didn't." The other thing Wolverine didn€™t know is that falling from that height and at that speed, hitting the water would have been like crashing into a wall. So, yeah: Mori is probably dead.
Contributor
Contributor

Child of the 80's. Brought up on Star Trek, Video Games and Schwarzenegger, my tastes evolved to encompass all things geeky.