10 Worst Video Game Heroes Of All Time

2. John Yesterday (Yesterday)

Devil may cry dante
Pendulo Studios

Worst Offence: Does. Not. Compute.

Did you ever play Yesterday and its sequel Yesterday Origins? Probably not, since it’s a low-rent Broken Sword-a-like that’s completely over-priced. Heading up the two games is the impossibly named John Yesterday, an immortal who, upon each resurrection, must re-remember who he was before. It’s basically Memento meets the Spanish Inquisition.

‘All right,’ you’re thinking, ‘That sounds pretty cool.’ You’re right – it does. But it’s also unutterably ruined by our so-called hero, John. Chiefly, it’s his voice: A slow, monotone drawl that, we guess, is supposed to come off as laid-back, but actually sounds more like he’s comatose and being forced to read from a script he’s never seen before, in a language he’s unfamiliar with.

And that lasts throughout the game, John never once dips and rolls into anything approximating emotion.

Despite a promising concept, thanks to the vocally challenged John, the Yesterday games are largely unplayable for anyone with ears that work. Hell, the voice-acting in Resident Evil was Oscar-worthy compared to this shtick.

Contributor
Contributor

Word-wrangler and video gamer on the rocks. Once completed the original Resident Evil in 1 hour 4 minutes. Prefers Irish coffee over any other kind. Former movie trailer writer, now rehabilitated. Wrote the viral videos for the movie Watchmen. Likes sarcasm, cynicism, smoking and you.