9. Rampage In An Ice Cream Van
On the other end of the vehicular slaughter spectrum, there's nothing that made rampaging lunacy seem that bit more crazy than taking to the streets in a goddamned Mr. Whoopee. You knew that rare as it was, it was a terrible vehicle it was fragile like a teenage girl's self-esteem and slower than fossilisation, but some time between throwing buses at police roadblocks and piloting Hydras through skyscraper corridors, you looked at this ice cream van with burning ambition. After all, if you could become public enemy number 1 in this, you could become it in just about anything. The fact you could make it play a jaunty tune was just a bonus. And so it began. You'd drive this piece of crap all round Liberty City/Vice City/San Andreas trolling the police with that glorious music, dodging, dipping, diving and dodging the police in something which clearly didn't belong on GTA's Most Wanted. The overzealous police would overtake you in a chase, look slightly bemused and double back, despairing at the tragic hilarity of it all. And there you were, aiming your SMG out the window and offering a melodic middle finger to the boys in blue. God save me, I love that van. It's like marriage you know it's going to be terrible and it'll end badly, but you've got to try it at least eight times, you coward.