10 Lessons Doctor Who Teaches Us About Christmas
2. Be Very Afraid If You Hear Slade's Merry Christmas Everybody
In a universe full of the most extraordinary coincidences, on a land in which it never rains but it pours, the fact that bad things are often foreshadowed by this festive song shouldn’t exactly surprise us. It’s on multiple radio stations at least twelve times a day from mid-November right through to Christmas, as well as being on a constant loop in countless shopping malls.
Nevertheless, be warned, because the next time you hear Noddy Holder scream ‘it’s Christmasssss!’, there could be trouble ahead. The anthem has featured on no less than six occasions in the series.
Mickey hears it on the radio just before the TARDIS crashes on the Powell Estate; Donna unwisely plays it at her wedding reception; her mother Sylvia opens a musical Christmas card shortly before everybody is turned into the Master race; it’s on the hospital radio at Rory’s work, when mysterious cubes start causing heart attacks across the globe; and Shona sings and dances to the song in an effort to avoid seeing the dream crabs. There really is no escape from the invading Slade, for sure enough it even turns up in the parallel world of Turn Left.
If that wasn’t reason enough to block your ears, well, just think on this - it could be a harbinger of an even scarier proposition. Noddy Holder has intimated that he’d rather like to be the Doctor one day, adding that he already looks the part. It might be an idea to set up an amnesty to dispose of every single copy in existence.