13 Things Non-Fans Always Get Wrong About Doctor Who

1. He's Called 'Doctor Who'

No he most certainly is not! ...but you're forgiven for thinking so. As with confusion surrounding the name of the show itself, the show itself must take some of the blame for confusion around the name of the character, chiefly due to the name of the show itself. Following so far? Good. Firstly, the show's called "Doctor Who" and the lead character is called "The Doctor". Logical non-fan deduction: his name is "Doctor Who". Secondly, in the very first episode of the show in 1963 Ian Chesterton referred to him as "Doctor Foreman", to which the First Doctor immediately responded, "Eh? Doctor who? What's he talking about?". Logical non-fan deduction: his name is "Doctor Who". Thirdly, despite no such reference in the dialogue, the name of one episode of the 1965 serial The Chase was "The Death Of Doctor Who". Logical non-fan deduction: his name is "Doctor Who". Fourthly, in the 1966 story The War Machines two characters referred to The Doctor as "Doctor Who" six times in two episodes: Wotan: Doctor Who is required. Bring him here.Brett: No. Top priority is to enlist Doctor Who. He has advanced knowledge which WOTAN needs. Doctor Who must be enlisted into our services tonight.Wotan: Doctor Who is required.Wotan: Where is Doctor Who?Wotan: Other means must be employed. Doctor Who is required.Logical non-fan deduction: his name is "Doctor Who". Fifthly, in the 1966 story The Gunfighters, the Doctor announces himself under the assumed name of Doctor Caligari. When someone asks, "Doctor who?", the First Doctor responds, "Yes, quite right". Logical non-fan deduction: his name is "Doctor Who". Sixthly, in the 1968 serial Fury From The Deep, the Second Doctor is referred to as "Doctor Who". Logical non-fan deduction: his name is "Doctor Who". Seventhly, in 1970 a seven part serial was wrongly given the on-screen caption "Doctor Who And The Silurians", even though there was no reference to "Doctor Who" in the serial's dialogue. Either way, logical non-fan deduction: his name is "Doctor Who". Eighthly, from 1970 to 1975 the Third and Fourth Doctors drove an old yellow roadster with the number plates 'WHO 1'. Logical non-fan deduction: his name is "Doctor Who". Ninthly, in his last season 1973-74 the Third Doctor drove a bizarre flying hovercrafty thingo with the number plates 'WV0 2M'. Although never referred to as such on screen, it was otherwise named 'the Whomobile'. Logical non-fan deduction: his name is "Doctor Who". Tenthly, from 1980-86 the Doctor continuously wore shirt collars with embroidered question marks on them. Additionally, between 1987 and 1989 he wore question marks on his vest and his umbrella handle was also in the shape of a question mark. Logical non-fan deduction: his name is "Doctor Who". And finally, eleventhly, throughout the new series countless characters have questioned "Doctor who?" whenever the Doctor has announced himself as "The Doctor". Notable examples include Madame de Pompadour in The Girl In The Fireplace, Dorium Maldovar in The Wedding Of River Song, Clara Oswald in The Snowmen and a whole bunch of Daleks in Asylum Of The Daleks. Logical non-fan deduction: his name is "Doctor Who". But you, dear non-fans, can forget all of that. Despite a compelling body of evidence seemingly to the contrary, his actual name isn't Doctor Who at all. He's just The Doctor.
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I'm just a guy who loves words. I discover vast tracts of uncharted enjoyment by chucking words together and coming up with stuff that talks about the things I enjoy and love most. I'm also a massive listaholic, so I'm probably talking about a list, looking at a list or banging away at another What Culture list as you read this. My tone's pretty relaxed and conversational, with a liberal sprinkling of sparkling wit, wilting sarcasm and occasional faux-condescension - with tongue almost always firmly planted in cheek.