9 Ups & 1 Down From Star Trek: Lower Decks 5.5 — Starbase 80?!

Don't do decon gel, kids! It really is a slippery slope down to the harder stuff like… a sonic shower. In any case, we should be thanking Starbase 80's antiquated transporter systems, unfit for organic matter (a reference to "armoury officers and helmsmen" of the NX-01 [Broken Bow]) for providing us with one very memorable scene. We knew it was coming from the trailers, but decon did definitely not disappoint!

BEARD WATCH! The GOAT with the goatee had one of the best lines of the episode. "Check me out. I'm a total T'Pol over here," Boimler boimlered, blue underwear and everything, as he slathered himself in the sexed-up substance introduced in Star Trek: Enterprise. More hair, a little less Boimler this time, though he certainly put his back into it with brilliance.

Commander Ransom — muscularly matched with Trip — took a literal shine to the decon gel. The dismay of his colleagues was our great amusement. Of course he then carried a pot around with him on the Starbase, like a 24th century snuffbox. In fact, we'd be surprised if he's not playing water polo on the Cerritos in a pool of decon gel right now. Oops, there goes gravity (again)!