2. Pierce Says Goodbye
YahooPierce died in one of the grossest ways imaginable; of dehydration from filling up several cylinders with his sperm. It was a ridiculous concept, but it was necessary to offset the extremely sad farewell Q and A he had prepared for his friends. He was always the trying to pit the group against each other (kind of only a few loose screws away from becoming a full-blown super villain) with manipulation and deceit, but he also truly loved his adopted family, and wanted to do right by them in the strangest way possible. After the group spent the majority of the time arguing with each other as Pierce's lawyer Mr. Stone (played by the always excellent Walton Goggins) revealed intimate details about each of them that Pierce was privy to, they settled down and agreed to let Pierce have his last laugh, and readied themselves for the knock-out blow. But instead of the usual Hawthorne cruelty, Pierce's words were heartfelt and touching, especially toward Britta, Shirley, and Annie (his favourite). As for the guys, Jeff got some scotch, Abed was called weird, and Troy was given the remainder of Pierce's fortune with the opportunity to find the hero within. If these final words for the ones he loved weren't offset with the gift of his sperm, Pierce's goodbye would've left everyone watching in a puddle of tears and broken hearts.
Key Line: "Troy Barnes. Did you know you possess the greatest gift life can give? The heart of a hero. And it's up to you not to waste it like I did." - Mr. Stone, speaking for Pierce Hawthorne.