10 Absolutely RIDICULOUS Wrestling Theme Lyrics

9. Ricky Steamboat - The Dragon

WWE

Early WCW themes were largely indistinct, or plain piss, in comparison to the WWF's iconic powerhouses.

In addition to the tremendous sexy synth stylings of Rick Rude's 'Simply Ravishing', Ricky Steamboat's 'Opening Ceremony' was the sh*t. Just impossibly grandiose, the theme was dignified, epic, and promised a show of rich, consummate quality.

But this was Steamboat's WCW theme. His LOLWCW theme, the Dragon, was a laid-back, funky, almost comically porn ditty boasting lyrics both curious and awful. Initially as nice and earnest as the subject - 'Loves his wife and son and does the best he can' - the following lyric casts a spell of confusion.

'The only wrestler who's not hard to understand'.

Record scratch.

What?

Ric Flair wasn't a character in a late David Lynch film; he was that bleach blonde narcissist who went an hour with his opponents and your missus. Wrestlers, fundamentally, are not hard to understand. The good guys are technically proficient or powerful, and trusting, and the bad guys cheat, until they become good, at which point they become technically proficient or powerful, and trusting.

It, for whatever reason, was important to convey that Ricky was handsome, and not without his admirers.

'I'm not saying that women don't fall over him / But he don't give in / He's a family man.'

Brilliantly, this is sung over a key change. It is very important that you are alerted to this additional information.

Contributor
Contributor

Former Power Slam Magazine scribe and author of Development Hell: The NXT Story - available NOW on shop.whatculture.com!