10 Insane Wrestling Stories Nobody Ever Talks About

7. The Ultimate Warrior Is Ben Stiller, Basically

Move Over Undertaker
WWE.com

Ben Stiller in Dodgeball plays a grotesque parody of masculinity - a ripped fitness guru who suppresses his urges to eat because he considers it a sign of weakness.

Dodgeball is a comedy film that features intentionally farcical, over-the-top scenarios designed to make the audience laugh. There is a pirate in it. Dodgeball exists to suspend disbelief for 90 minutes of absurd entertainment. There is a scene in Dodgeball in which Stiller's character, White Goodman, subverts his appetite by using a slice of pizza as a means of sexual arousal. It's dumb, dumb preposterous sh*t, and of course the dumb, dumb preposterous Ultimate Warrior behaved like this in real life.

The Warrior devised an ingenious method of enjoying cookies without the attendant, bad effect on his health: he used to grab cookies, crumple them up in his hand, and smell the crumbs.

"Put it in your mouth, Jim."

"NOOOOOOOO! THAT'S WHAT GAYYYYYY PEOPLE DO!"

The Warrior's infamous, ugly, "queering don't make the world work" rant is a bit rich, in retrospect. The dumbass didn't even know how to make eating work, which most infants grasp at six months.

Contributor
Contributor

Michael Sidgwick is an editor, writer and podcaster for WhatCulture Wrestling. With over seven years of experience in wrestling analysis, Michael was published in the influential institution that was Power Slam magazine, and specialises in providing insights into All Elite Wrestling - so much so that he wrote a book about the subject. You can order Becoming All Elite: The Rise Of AEW on Amazon. Possessing a deep knowledge also of WWE, WCW, ECW and New Japan Pro Wrestling, Michael’s work has been publicly praised by former AEW World Champions Kenny Omega and MJF, and current Undisputed WWE Champion Cody Rhodes. When he isn’t putting your finger on why things are the way they are in the endlessly fascinating world of professional wrestling, Michael wraps his own around a hand grinder to explore the world of specialty coffee. Follow Michael on X (formerly known as Twitter) @MSidgwick for more!