10 Insane Wrestling Stories Nobody Ever Talks About
6. The Ultimate Warrior Is Also So Much Worse Than You Even Thought Possible
Man, the Ultimate Warrior was a lousy piece of sh*t.
This is understood by now, despite his widow's insistence that his "heart was changed" following conversations with his daughters, or some sh*t. This might have happened, but then, Dana is hardly a credible witness. She claimed last year that the Warrior's ghost once battled several poltergeists in their New Mexico home, which doubled as a portal for disembodied spirits. This women is a key part of WWE creative, which explains a lot.
Apparently, "There were just smells and rattling and really really scary stuff," Dana claimed. "You could smell Warrior in the house and he was fighting and he was battling and it went on and on and on," she said, as if Warrior wouldn't have been too gassed or upset at the payoff by that point.
Dana and those "smells", Christ. Why can't you smell bullsh*t, Dana? It reeks, and it is your life.
We know the Warrior was a hateful monster who deemed homosexuals unnatural and who laughed at Bobby Heenan's struggles with throat cancer. But it's not as if Warrior would desert one of his terminally ill young fans, is it?
Stupid dying kid didn't know to make the world work, obviously, and so Warrior, after telling the PR rep to give him a "f*ckin' minute", made the child and his family move because they were getting in the way of his entrance. A disgusted Bret Hart recounted this story in his autobiography. "My disgust for Warrior magnified a thousand times," he wrote.
You cannot change that which never existed.