Triple H and Stephanie McMahon Helmsley have sat like cackling hyenas at the top of the onscreen WWE pyramid for over two years now, flinging rotten eggs and worse at everyone below them. Leaving aside their legitimate positions of authority in the company, theyre incredibly frustrating to watch as television performers: theyre both capable of real brilliance, and both can be villains of staggering proportions, but seem torn between properly heeling it up and seeking the approval of the crowd, often at the expense of the actual wrestling performers theyre supposed to be helping get over. In late 2015, the WWE crowd doesnt know whether its supposed to boo them or cheer them. Stephanie is supervising the Divas Revolution as a babyface while crapping all over the other performers as a heel, while Triple Hs character is both the cuddly father figure behind the breakout success of NXT and the bullying d*ckhead that keeps belittling and crushing the spirits of the main roster. They should have one of the babyface NXT graduates bring it up in a promo - Hey, Hunter, you were always such a great, supportive boss in developmental. Why are you such a manipulative, nasty toolbox on RAW? Even better would be a carefully shot and edited confrontation and fight between NXT Triple H and RAW Triple H for the soul of Paul Levesque, like the Superman vs. Clark Kent battle in Superman III (aka The Greatest Scene In Cinema History). Id pay $9.99 to see that. Its been two years of the Helmsleys constantly acting as the kayfabe gatekeepers to the main event and the WWE World Heavyweight Championship, and all theyve done in the last year is confuse matters. Theyve caused their chosen figureheads, heel champions Randy Orton and Seth Rollins, more grief and hassle than any of the babyface challengers theyve been feuding with. The WWE World Heavyweight Championship should be the kayfabe reward for reaching the top of the food chain, not the plaything of capricious heel bosses, to throw around on a whim and use as a prop to beat people with. I think its time to give the Authority a rest: not for a few weeks, as happened after Survivor Series last year, but for good. If you must have an on-air authority figure, give us a neutral, well known face like Jake The Snake Roberts, Diamond Dallas Page or even Mark Henry, whos nearing the end of his in-ring career: someone who wont necessarily overshadow the active performers, who can play the kind of role that William Regal does in NXT.
Professional writer, punk werewolf and nesting place for starfish. Obsessed with squid, spirals and story. I publish short weird fiction online at desincarne.com, and tweet nonsense under the name Jack The Bodiless. You can follow me all you like, just don't touch my stuff.
