10 Things Vince McMahon Has In Common With A Small Child
9. He Does Not Sleep
This is the worst test facing any parent: the literally tortuous experience that is sleep deprivation.
Unless you're one of the lucky ones, your baby will not sleep through the night. If they don't constantly require milk, or become irritated when they piss or soil themselves, they can't sleep without body warmth. And so, if it's a a two-guardian unit, each parent takes it in turn to sit up, hold the infant in their arms, as the other catches up on an elusive human need. It's a cycle; you can't bite through it and encourage a young infant to soothe themselves to sleep because you need sleep as well.
Even when they start sleeping through, it's a f*cker actually getting them to sleep and they invariably wake up too early.
Vince McMahon sleeps only a few hours per night.
Unlike an actual child, who won't sleep as a result of separation anxiety, Vince doesn't sleep because he enjoys having a heavily muscled body and is bustling with so many ideas for how to put smiles on people's faces that he owes it to the WWE Universe to be a workaholic.
That doesn't explain why Raw was the same show for two decades, but still: countless people affiliated with WWE have told the story of Vince's refusal to sell for sleep.
What's a more effective torture device: lack of sleep, or watching Raw every week?