10 Totally Stupid Things WWE Has ALREADY DONE Since WrestleMania 33
5. The Artist Known As Shinsuke Nakamura
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The booking to which Shinsuke Nakamura has been subjected is enough to help one embrace nihilism.
Deep down, we knew it was going to be this way. We knew that Nakamura's awesome body of work in NXT - his transition from wrestler to sports entertainer has been remarkable, all things considered - would count for naught on the main stage. Nakamura is just too different, too other, for Vince McMahon not to handle with skepticism. And, plainly, he's just too damn Japanese for Kevin Dunn to produce with anything approaching tact.
Nakamura's new nickname is the "Artist Known As Shinsuke Nakamura". Dolph Ziggler compared him unfavourably to Michael Jackson on a recent episode of SmackDown. Yes, Jacko was (partly) the inspiration behind his look - but only WWE could a) confuse the two most unique and prominent pop cultural icons of the 1980s and b) reduce the most cutting edge act in all of wrestling to a damn stub.
There's no real danger that Nakamura won't be received as the special act he is in good time. His match with Dolph Ziggler is practically guaranteed to be very good at the very least, and it's taking place in Chicago. It might as well be in a furnace.
But still, the point remains: why make the poor bloke, with his improving but limited grasp of English, talk through a mouthguard? You're meant to be sh*t scared of Nakamura. You're not meant to pity him. It's not that hard.