12 Ways WWE Can Still #FreeWrestleMania From Sucking

5. The Beast And The Demons

Brock Lesnar is supposed to go one-on-one with Dean Ambrose at WrestleMania 32, which is a horrible, horrible idea. Lesnar eats singles competitors for breakfast. Remember, this is a dragon built up for Roman Reigns to slay at last year's WrestleMania, except that WWE got cold feet at the last minute and didn't pull the trigger on Reigns. That left us with a dragon ravaging the countryside and no white knight to end its reign of terror. Now, Dean Ambrose is a better babyface, a better character in general, and for damn sure would make a better WWE World Heavyweight Champion than Reigns... but he's no dragonslayer. There's a reason why Lesnar's most interesting matches since he became The Beast Incarnate have been triple threats: in singles matches, the current iteration of the Brock Lesnar character doesn't do anything except swagger about the ring suplexing people and sniggering about it. Swagger. Suplex. Snigger. Repeat. If Ambrose vs. Lesnar at WrestleMania actually happens, it'll just be something we've seen before. We saw it when he pasted Cena at SummerSlam 2013, and when he pulverised Seth Rollins at Battleground 2014. Jon Good deserves a better match than that, and so do we. Hey, even Lesnar himself must be getting bored of the same dance by now. So let's change it. Lesnar's facing Bray Wyatt at Roadblock this weekend, and Bray Wyatt is accompanied by three massive redneck psychopaths at all times. Have Lesnar beaten down by the entire Wyatt Family to win by disqualification at Roadblock... only to appear on RAW the following Monday and demand to face the entire Wyatt Family at WrestleMania 32 in a handicap match. It's never been done before, and it's the only match I can think of for Lesnar right now where you honestly can't say whether he'll win. It forces him to change his game, to work harder and to step outside of the comfort zone of Suplex City, because all four Wyatts together aren't likely to give him time to do his usual schtick. And the Wyatts and Lesnar really worked at the Rumble: it was one of the most exciting things to happen all night. It also gives the Wyatts a high profile WrestleMania match, and frees Ambrose for other, better things.
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Professional writer, punk werewolf and nesting place for starfish. Obsessed with squid, spirals and story. I publish short weird fiction online at desincarne.com, and tweet nonsense under the name Jack The Bodiless. You can follow me all you like, just don't touch my stuff.