5 Most Insane Things Happening In Wrestling Right Now (Dec 21)
3. The State Of These NXT Call-Ups
We're also sick of NXT acts promoted en masse to the main roster, who, astonishingly, are presented as faces in the crowd before they've even blended in. And so, to shake things up, instead of scripting engaging storylines on behalf of countless existing acts with much potential, WWE is instead set to increase the field of the André The Giant Memorial Battle Royal from 30 to 40.
That's a reductive but no less cynical take, but examining the names on case-by-case basis, this cynicism feels justified. Also: they barely book Andrade Almas, so what chance does any other f*cker have?
Nikki Cross likes to "play", which is fortunate, since there'll be plenty of time to get on the Switch when she's asked to arrive at and not appear on television like the rest of her SAnitY stablemates.
EC3 occupies the top 1% of the pro wrestling world, but there's two more numbers he'll have to get used to - 5 0 / 5 0 - by, what, March? Is that too cynical? Too optimistic?
Lars Sullivan, and here's something more backwards than his message board takes, remains fairly green. So yes, the guy who still needs to develop has been promoted from developmental ahead of Ricochet because he is f*cking massive. It's been like this for decades. Much like wider society, WWE fans live in a post-1984 nightmare.
Along similar lines, Lacey Evans isn't ready either. But she is blonde, and that's all that matters. If only Bucky Beaver could chew through his own wood, thus removing his c*ck from his hand for once.
Otis Dozovic's worm will pop Vince's daft old head for about three weeks, at least until he takes notice of that troubling growth on his side. That thing looks ugly, painful. What is it? A tag team partner? Get out of my sight, d*mn it!
Maybe it won't be so bad. Maybe we should give WWE a chance. Without a crystal ball, we aren't to know.
Fortunately, WWE taped the next episode of RAW immediately following last night's live edition, so let's take a look at the spoilers for this dawn of a new, fresh era...